Pug-Monkey Hires an Escort

Cream tugged at his faux schnauzer mustache to make sure it was on straight and almost lost his balance. He felt awkward. His tail was tucked into his trousers and his fur was dyed dark grey. It was the best disguise he could manage. Hopefully it would fool Turmick.

He was grateful his escort was wearing an outfit that provided purchase for his pawgers. Shirley ambled along the private tunnel as if she were showing him off but even she was occasionally jostled in the small space. Cream kept slipping down her torso and catching his rear pawgers in her cleavage until he finally climbed up on her shoulder.

No one was giving them dirty looks and muttering about species mingling. A few beings in the public passageways had. Cream began to relax even though his grip on her was tenuous.

Not much further, he thought. The luxury liner is just around the next corner.

They were almost to the loading dock when they saw the crowd. A man was waving a space suit liner and yelling.

“Blown seals! The crew of Victoria doesn’t care about your lives! They only want to turn an obscene profit!”

A large man in uniform came out of the airlock. “Get out of the way you charlatan! He’s just angry because he doesn’t have the credit for a trip. There’s nothing to worry about gentlemen and ladies. Step right up, never mind the madman. That liner was never even on this fine ship!”

“We should be able to get past him and into the ship” murmured Shirley.

“I have a bad feeling about this” Cream whispered. “He doesn’t look like Turmick but he is about the right size.”

“Time for an alternate entry?”

Cream nodded. Shirley knew what she was doing, but if she had to move fast he would have a hard time holding on. He slowly eased the fly of his trousers open. He let his tail snake out and wrap around the sturdy collar of her outfit.

Much better, he thought.

Shirley strutted down a side tunnel until she found a small private bubble ship. A very pretty, very rich young man was leaving the airlock.

Shirley swiveled her hips and slid halfway into the lock. “I’ll leave the internal cams running” she winked.

The man’s eyes got big as he saw the tip of Cream’s tail running down Shirley’s neck. Then he smiled.

Shirley hot pulsed the ship, turned off the cams and slid out of the dock. She guided the ship around the station until they could approach Victoria from behind.

“I thought there was only one way to board.” Cream was confused.

“Oh, this is only one of Victoria’s secrets” Shirley smiled as the little ship kissed Victoria’s hidden airlock.

Inventions of the Future: Alternate Nourishment

“It not easy” Floyd said with a grin.

“Look asshole, you don’t have to repeat that tired old cliché every time I’m upset about something.” Choe stretched her olive arms over the table.

Floyd tried to look serious as he adjusted his tailored jacket and sipped his latte.

Choe rotated her arms in the direct sunlight.

“I’m sorry your mission didn’t get approved. With your talent another chance is sure to come along.”

“Missions aren’t like transit shuttles. This one was special.”

“Because it had Ike the bastard on it.”

“You can say whatever you want about him but he was willing to give a ‘synthesis girl a break.”

Floyd frowned into his cup.

“Don’t give me that look. It wouldn’t interfere with the zero-g adaptation I’d have to get.”

“I don’t think the technical issues are the problem” Floyd said uncertainly.

“It’s an identity issue.” Choe sounded tired. “My ancestors didn’t cut and run when things got too hot. None of the spacies like to be reminded of that.”

“Sometimes the attitude doesn’t help either.”

“Oh, yeah. That’s a bad word to use. I’ll remember to call them dispersed population from now on.” Choe snorted and propped her feet up on a vacant chair. Her dark legs gleamed in the bright light.

Floyd shook his head. “Then you’ll have to call me that too.” His pale hands clenched around his cup.

Choe was quiet for a moment.

“It’s also a modesty issue.”

“Oh please, that is so outdated. I can’t believe that people are still serious about it.”

“Some religious groups are.”

“All I’m doing here is nourishing myself. It’s healthy not immoral.”

Floyd tugged on the cuffs of his white shirt. “Which is fine down here on the surface. Up there they have regulations about wearing a space suit all the time in certain crafts. You wouldn’t be exempt.”

“It wouldn’t be a problem.”

“You would have to start eating solids.”

“I know that.”

“But could you live with it?”

“My system is a hybrid. I can switch between fuel types indefinitely.”

“But, do you want to? Your people were too stubborn to leave before, why the change of heart?”

“It was a challenge to stay back then. Now that the climate has settled it’s a challenge to leave.”

Inventions of the Future: Meat Jackets

Freedi sighed as he slipped his thin frame into the jacket. Being Minister of Fun was hard work and he was looking forward to the vacation. As the jacket zipped up around him he tried to ignore the disorientation caused by two nervous systems synching up. He wouldn’t be fully integrated for a few moments but he was in good enough shape to navigate to the airlock.

After the lock finished cycling it dropped in directly into a pneumatic transit tube. He was smiling by the time a puff of air gently set him down on a landing pad. He was sure that the smile translated to the outside of the jacket. It didn’t matter. Silly hoomins were rushing around on their own business and completely ignoring him.

They had no idea that Freedi and his cluster mates still inhabited the station. Build us a deep station, they had asked his queen, one close to the Antivish nexus. We will pay you for it and then you will leave.

Because the request had been childish and silly, Freedi had been sent. He built the station. He accepted payment. He did not leave. Why should he? They weren’t advanced enough to detect his presence much less make him leave. Besides, cruising around in a meat jacket pretending to be one of them was fun. And that was his job.

Inventions of the Future: Clones

“You can’t keep pushing me this hard. I can only do so much work in a day” huffed Sean.

“Well, don’t blame me for that. You have alternatives.” Jenny smirked.

“Huh. I don’t see some of your ‘choices’ working out so well.”

“I’m sure I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“What about the one who ran off with the asteroid miner?”

“No process is perfect. You have to expect a few anomalies here and there. The payoff more than justifies that.”

“But you don’t have control over any of them. They aren’t extensions of yourself.”

“Most of them are perfectly happy to accept the assignments I give them. I know for a fact they can do quality work, unlike certain colleagues who would rather sit around complaining.”

“Well, I guess that means I hit a nerve. Don’t they make you wonder how your life would be different if you had made different decisions, had different opportunities?”

“Well of course I wonder about things. Doesn’t mean I have any regrets.”

“Haven’t you ever thought it might be kind of weird and creepy to have fifty versions of you running around?”

“It’s all a matter of perspective and yours is warped by jealousy.”

“It’s not like you allow them any kind of individuality. You even pick out their hairstyles and clothes.”

“I’m the original! I know what’s best for all of us!”

“They do have their own thoughts. Stifle them too much and they will all start rebelling like Jenny 12 did.”

“They are free to make their own decisions. I only act as a guide and advisor.”

“Are you sure you don’t control too much of their personal lives?”

“I don’t control them at all. How dare you suggest that?”

Sean leaned back with a confident, cocky smile. Then he went in for the kill. “Well, if you aren’t trying to stifle them, I guess it won’t bother you to know that my last three dates with Jenny 45 have gone very well.”

Pug-Monkey Does an About Face

Cream licked his nose nervously and made his way back to the main marketplace. Was Davy friends with Turmick or was he just taking on another passenger?

Doesn’t matter, thought Cream, I can’t go on that ship now.

Cream started checking other ship schedules on a public terminal. Only two that could carry passengers were leaving in the next week. He had four hours before the first one left.

He continued to query for everything from luxury services to personal, by the hour companionship. As he worked he let the soft pad of his dew clap brush against the touch screen of the terminal. It took the executable a few seconds to slide through the screen.

A small strawberry icon appeared at the bottom of the screen. “An identity scanning program aimed at pug-monkey chimeras has been running on Station Two network for one local year. Unknown author, unauthorized registry. I’ll take care of it for you, sugar.” The strawberry winked at Cream and disappeared.

I am so glad I didn’t accidentally eat Symix, thought Cream. I wonder if he knows I thought he was strawberry flavored gelly?

Cream headed to the address Janice had given him. Janice had friends everywhere so Cream had friends everywhere.