Hello, my name is Zark Colepsy and welcome to today’s edition of This Old Bot. This rotation we will be looking at the renovations taking place on a whole collection of fembots created by a doctor for espionage missions. Here is our expert Harry Mann. Hi Harry can you tell us a little about why a doctor would create female spy and assassin robots?
Well, Zark, he’s a really evil guy. He’s not a medical doctor, he didn’t go to school all those years just to be called mister.
I see, did he have any specific jobs for these bots?
Oh, they are very good at ambushing swinging British spies.
Is there a reason he sold all of them?
Yeah, they’ve been replaced by some crazy super model units. The new units can actually use their bones as weapons because they don’t have any flesh to get in the way and they can hide all kinds of stuff in their weird couture outfits. The older units are a bit curvier and are limited to pectoral pistols.
So, Harry, what new job are they being renovated for?
Light duty bodyguards and corporate espionage mostly. It’s amazing, some of the places you can put a camera.
What stage of the renovations are they in?
Yeah, baby, lots of lube jobs.
Uh huh. Ok Harry. What about their personality modules? Do those need to be adjusted for their new jobs?
Yeah, I can adjust them by remote. I’ll show you what I can do on my favorite girl. Check this out.
Oh, baby. I’m so glad you’re back. I’ve been missing you. Would you like some champagne and a back rub?
You bastard! You came home with rust on your crankshaft! Where were you last night?
Hi honey. My girlfriend, Bambi, will be in town for a week. I told her she can stay with us. I hope you don’t mind.
Down on your knees worm! You have been a very bad boy and I am going to punish you!
Hmm, very impressive Harry.
Yeah, it’s great. Just one problem. No matter which personality is active they have access to their entire memory module and I haven’t been able to erase that yet.
Why does that matter?
I said down on your knees!
You can turn her off now.
Don’t make me get the whip!
I said, you can turn her off now, Harry.
*click* *click* *click*
The batteries in the remote must be dead. RUN!
So, you think Bambi is hotter than I am? You have no idea what I am going to do to you!
And that (huff) concludes this segment (huff) of This Old Bot. I’m Zark (huff) Colepsy and thank you (huff) for receiving this transmission.